Thank you cards, dear reader, are a must. The feminine woman of excellence does not neglect to send them whenever:
- She receives any sort of gift
- She receives a favor that required someone to go out of his or her way for her
- She has an interview
- Someone did something very special or very thoughtful for her, or somehow changed her life for the better out of the goodness of his or her heart
The heart of the matter is the obvious, that anytime a woman receives any of these things, she should experience a real sense of gratitude and appreciation, and have this as her motive for sending a thank you note or card.
However, to experience that is something of a gift and a blessing – not all women do. Regardless of whether that is present or not, dear reader, the thank you note must be sent, and within two weeks of receiving the gift or favor. If a woman is late, though, this is far, far better than not sending one at all. It must be in written form – simply saying “thank you” will not have the same effect. It should be sent via the postal service or email at minimum. However, getting a physical card is a much better and will have a more lasting and meaningful effect.
When someone receives a thank you note, he or she with replace any previous ideas and thoughts about you and you will, without fail, be seen in a positive light. Neglecting to send one will have the opposite effect. It will make you look rude, inconsiderate, or ignorant, and that person is less likely to want to send you gifts or do you favors in the future.
Sending a thank you card will make you look better, and be a testament to your own manners and class.
There is something of a misconception that showing thanks and appreciation will make herself look weaker. Often-times, a woman will rationalize not sending a card by telling herself that the sender already “knows” that she is grateful or something along the lines of “that’s so old-fashioned; people don’t send thank you cards these days and I’ll look weird.” Or she may feel a sense of resistance to giving respect and good manners to someone whom she cannot look up to. This, however, is because she believes that showing respect and appreciation will cheapen her words or her judgment in character.
But the real reason why she must still give that respect and kindness is because it isn’t about that person. You do not do it to honor what is wrong in another but out of a respect for yourself and your own stature and character – you do it for yourself. Whether that person understands or not is beside the point and is irrelevant.
Charles Dickens notes this effect in Hard Times, a book of English literature written to critique some of the effects of industrialization in Great Britain:
“Mrs. Sparsit’s “sir” in addressing Mr. Bounderby, was a word of ceremony, rather exacting consideration for herself in the use than honouring him.”
This applies not only to writing thank you cards, but in many situations, if you reflect on this point, dear reader.
Another, perhaps more selfish, reason to send a thank you note is because it is to your own advantage to have the goodwill of another – you never know when that person’s good opinion may be of use to you in the future. This is a phenomenon commonly noted as “karma.” It is true, dear reader. What you put out into the world is what you get back, oftentimes in very poetic and surprisingly predictable ways.