Charm School Pt. 1: How to Be Charming

Being charming, dear reader, is what will distinguish you as a memorable and captivating, rather than a dull and forgettable one.

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The charming woman dazzles.  She inspires, she has the ability to make others do as she wills.

“But since we’re all more likely to do business and build professional and personal relationships with people we like, we’re naturally drawn to people who are polite, modest, agreeable, kind. In short, people who are charming.”

The charming woman is first of all friendly.  She isn’t overly so, or overly familiar (as she wants to maintain her sense of respect), but she is very approachable and she doesn’t hesitate to approach others.

She is not shy, and she genuinely enjoys social interaction.  Indeed, it seems that she becomes energized by it.

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The feminine woman of excellence, dear reader, must know how to be charming when she wants to be.  She does not have to be a charming social butterfly at all times, but she does need to be able to call upon it when needed.

Secondly, the charming woman asks others questions and establishes a genuine interest in the responses.

To be interesting, dear reader, one must be interested.

People, above all want to feel as though they are important, and if you can make them feel that way, you become instantly charming (:

“If some people are so hungry for a feeling of importance that they actually go insane to get it, imagine what miracle you and I can achieve by giving people honest appreciation this side of insanity”

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This, dear reader, is the essence of being charming:

“Why talk about what we want? That is childish. Absurd. Of course, you are interested in what you want. You are eternally interested in it. But no one else is. The rest of us are just like you: we are interested in what we want. So the only way on earth to influence other people is to talk about what they want and show them how to get it.”

We have all experienced that person who can’t seem to find any conversation topic to discuss other than him or herself, and without fail, that person is universally resented and soon left without any audience at all.

If you wish to be charming dear reader, you must forget about yourself and engage in others.  It is the only way, and it will win you much success and satisfaction socially.

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Beyond these fundamentals, charm can be enhanced by:

  • looking one’s best (it is often easier to act the part if you feel good about the way you look)
  • dressing stylishly and well
  • being a good listener
  • giving out genuine compliments (avoid flattery however, as most people will easily recognize this)
  • smiling (in moderation, of course)
  • use of good eye contact
  • a good handshake
  • polite and eloquent language
  • cultivating a charming laugh
  • ignoring rude or tasteless comments in others (there are times however, when a more direct approach is necessary; this will be expanded upon later)
  • using names (people are more responsive to their own names than any other words)

Good luck and be brilliantly charming, dear reader (:

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